Dear HEB (or any other supermarket),
I'd like to use my blog let you know exactly what I want and don't want. For starters, I want you store to be laid out in some semblance of logic. Please quit putting half of the cold stuff three feet inside the door so that by the time I check out it's completely thawed. Also, if we could at least get food groups on adjoing rows, that would help greatly. Second, no I do not want any of your basket specials or wow items at the checkout, no matter how great of a buy it may be. I'll pass on the jumbo box of Nerds for 99 cents, the overstocked toothbrushes you haven't been able to sell for months, and the Coconut-Strawberry-Fusia hair conditioner. If I had wanted any of this I would have picked it up at the display you had at the front door...or in any of the other 7 aisles you placed this junk in the middle of througout the store. Thirdly, I also do not want to sign up for any special discount card. No, I do not want to give you every last ounce of my personal information in order to get a keychain card that allows me to save 2.8% on Tuesday mornings from 8 to 8:45 a.m. Thanks for your incredible generosity, but I'll pass. Finally, I also do not want to have to press eighteen buttons just to complete my transaction with my debit card. I slid the card. I typed in my pin number. Do you really have to ask me if the total is ok and if I am sure I want to make this transaction four more times? You've got to be kidding me! It has taken you supermarkets years to screw up the simple process that Mom & Pop grocery stores invented decades ago: I give you my money and you give me your products. Here's what I want: I want you to check out the stuff I've chosen and placed on the check out stand. I want you to do it quickly. And I want you to give me my stuff, my receipt, and my change (if necessary). It really is that simple.
A Customer Who Hopes To One Day Get In & Out of Your Supermarket In Less Than 1 Hour